TRYING TO STAY AFLOAT

Another day, another medical procedure. Having a chronic illness (or multiple…) is really a full-time job. When I’m not at a doctor’s appointment, I’m either thinking about calling to schedule a new appointment, having a procedure done, calling my insurance company to get them to approve something I desperately need for pain relief, or worrying about any of the above.

As I was laying stomach-down on the procedure table recently, waiting for the long needle to go towards my back, a lot was running through my mind.  Continue reading “TRYING TO STAY AFLOAT”

WHY ROMANTICIZING MENTAL ILLNESS IS HARMFUL

Romanticizing mental health issues is seen as a somewhat “cool” thing these days, but from someone that lives a life void of ‘normalcy’ due to the effects of mental health issues, I wanted to speak out. People with these issues wish they didn’t have to admit they had them, so hearing others say things such as “I’m so nervous, I have social anxiety”, or “I’m so bipolar today” is extremely painful.

Just like glamorizing a physical issue such as cancer, it’s simply in bad taste to spin a story that you have an issue that you don’t, to make yourself seem unique or more interesting – there are plenty of qualities that already make you unique. 🙂 What pretending does is damage the reputations of those who are suffering when we already aren’t taken very seriously.

I think about my issues every.single.day. because they affect me 24/7. I can’t conveniently “turn them off”. How I wish I could, because I would turn them off forever…

Mental illness is real. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

Read my OCD post here for more information regarding my struggles with OCD. 

-tired mind typing fingers

Photo via Pixabay

PUTTING IT DOWN ON PAPER

Depression has hit me hard lately. It’s always looming over my head like a storm, but it still seems to sink me deeper sometimes. If you don’t know what depression feels like, a good way to describe it is like a mosquito (or some other annoying bug) buzzing in your ear constantly, and you can’t swat it away. It’s unignorable – which apparently is not a real word, but let’s just ignore that little fact.

I haven’t been used to writing so I couldn’t even remember what writing program to open and write with. I figured it out, but that’s not how I want things to be going.

I don’t think I’ve cracked my laptop open in several days, which has been an ongoing trend. This plastic paper weight has just been sitting there, mocking me, and for some reason my cat thought it would be a good idea to sleep on it a couple of times. Because a hard plastic surface is comparable to a fluffy couch… I’ll never understand that! (Photo is reference for how comfy my cat looked while sleeping on my laptop.)

Continue reading “PUTTING IT DOWN ON PAPER”

I SPILLED COFFEE ON MY LAPTOP

A couple days ago, as I was trying to get comfortable in my chair, I accidentally moved my coffee mug, and it tipped over – almost in slow motion to mock me – sloshing its contents all over my laptop, which I had the mug placed on for whatever reason. I seem to use it as a table when I’m not actively using it. Why? I have no idea.

Anyway, that’s not an excuse as to why I’ve been a bit absent here. Fortunately my laptop is still holding up for now, it was closed when my coffee spilled but some did manage to make its way under the touchpad.

Continue reading “I SPILLED COFFEE ON MY LAPTOP”

15 THINGS I’VE LEARNED THROUGH THE DIAGNOSIS PROCESS OF A CHRONIC ILLNESS

I learned the hard way how to maneuver the medical world when searching so fervently for a real answer to my ever-lasting pain. See my posts about Endometriosis and Adenomyosis.

I made a bunch of mistakes, chose the wrong doctors, asked the wrong questions, didn’t ask enough questions, didn’t know much of anything.

I’m still learning, but I feel a bit more confident in my ability to handle appointments, and I now know when to get up and leave when a doctor is mistreating you – and to know that’s okay, and that it’s not always rude. (I’ve yet to do this, but I wanted to in some instances.) Continue reading “15 THINGS I’VE LEARNED THROUGH THE DIAGNOSIS PROCESS OF A CHRONIC ILLNESS”

BEING NICE

“Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.”
Henry James

I think every single one of us has had a not-so-pleasant experience, particularly in the customer service area – anything in the public, really.

Maybe they’re having a bad day, or you did the thing that annoys them the most – who knows? It’s understandable that they won’t be perfectly chipper each and every time they deal with somebody, they’re doing it all day long. Continue reading “BEING NICE”

OCD ISN’T A REAL CONDITION?

I can’t count how many times I’ve broken down from dealing with OCD, depression, and anxiety. How many tears I’ve shed; how many days I’ve felt like a waste of space, too tired to do anything productive; too scared of the future; too depressed to want to live anymore.

Sorry, this concept really grinds my gears. This may just be my snarkiest post yet… Continue reading “OCD ISN’T A REAL CONDITION?”