Lately I’ve been noticing a trend as I scavenge articles, blogs, written works: reminders to live life to the fullest, fully enjoy the moment, do what you love, appreciate everything. I think I’m partially looking for that sort of encouragement, but it’s also seemingly ‘finding me’, sprouting across almost every avenue I venture into. Coincidence?

My question is, how can I apply this thinking to my depressed mind? I want more than anything to be happy, I want more than anything to feel these ways. That is the hardest part.

Depression makes me feel as though I’m not even living, as if I’m stuck on a hamster wheel, just running my hands and feet along the wheel, over and over – it’s exercise, but it doesn’t get me anywhere. I feel like I’m riding a stationary bike. I’m overcome with exhaustion, but I haven’t made any progress.

Stagnant, stuck, unable.

I’m trying to find the good in my situation. I try to appreciate the little I have. Feeling numb (as depression often causes) can dull my attempts. I think the keyword that should be taken away is to try.

Goals are scary to me. Steps are better. I can take one step at a time, right?

Each day can be an opportunity to try to do one thing.

I found the quote below inspirational – depending on your mood, it may cause you to feel pressured into working too hard today. For me, it’s a good reminder to try a little bit every day.

“Who you are tomorrow begins with what you do today.”
Tim Fargo

Constant, consistent. Maybe that’s the answer.


Photo from, by DasWortgewand


Author: tiredmindtypingfingers

Writing about writing and chronic illness, and trying to make something out of it.

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